Wednesday, February 27, 2008

A Job Once Lost, the Conclusion

Tattered green awning
a town desolate and dead
Ferrelview, I'm home

So we have a meeting the next day after I am told I have until the end of the month, and I trudge on in there, still wondering what the fuck I am going to do about a job. The mood is festive, with everyone talking about how awesome it is that they got such sweet ass raises, which I am willing to bet combined would have equalled my annual salary.

I sit next to Big Jim, who is talking about the new sweet ass Ford F250 he just purchased once he got his raise, and how his penis grew and he was a major stallion with his wife the evening prior (I added that last part in, dammit there's no taste as powerful as the bitter palate humiliation brings) and everyone grabs a slice of pizza and sits down. My manager walks in and lets this go on for a few seconds, and sees me sitting there and tells everyone they should maybe not be so excited, not all of us got such good news. You remember that hot shame you had, when you were in Kindergarten and you had to sit in timeout because you flashed your penis to everyone who was outide from the second floor window of your classroom again and everyone is looking at you? How your ears burned and you wish you were not there? I experienced that same feeling, and instantly resolved to learnify as much of the k-rat as I could (I was a yellow belt at the time, not even close to high enough to defeat a group of ruffians in hand-to-hand combat) and kill everyone around the table.

Everyone got real quiet and looked at me for about 10 seconds, chewing their pizza quietly. You ever also notice that the quieter it gets the more you have to fart?

I informed them that I had a job (I didn't) and that it was for a raise (it ended up being for one, but I had no way of knowing that at that time)... and the fiesta started back up in earnest.

I finished out my time there, going in to work late and leaving early, not knowing soon I would get a job where that is expected of me, and I got the call from a staffing company. Apparently they had a sweet job, North of the River instead of Grain Valley, and it paid 2.50 more an hour. It was on a Wednesday, and I informed my job that if this went through I would not be in that following Monday. No one cared.

Anyhoo, That whole fiasco will be tomorrow's tale. On my last day, I packed all my crap up and threw it in my cherry 83 crown vic with the glove compartment that wouldnt shut and the doors that allowed snow intor them, and we all went out to lunch. It was this Mexican restaurant, which was odd, as it almost ensured that I would have explosive diahrrea the next day, like I did every time I ate at El Mezcal's, just off of Exit 20 off I-70. Good food, something in my tummy can't take it though.

I took a good long look at the RVs sitting behind the restaurants, the ones we had all joked the waiters and incredibly hot in a trashy way waitresses worked and lived in, as I was probably going to be living in the exact same place very soon.

Back at the parking lot, we all shook hands, promised to stay in touch, and parted ways. I always thought it was funny, when you and someone promise eachother to "stay in touch", knowing full well as soon as your hand released from the handshake you would forget who this person is and never contact them again, it's kinda sad too though. I mean the only person I kept in regular contact was was Jeremy, and that was not contact with the actual person, but with his photo, which I will post below:

Not... that was too easy... I will unleash Jeremy soon though.

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