Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Foolish Man.... Part I

A road less travelled,
Shutters sway in the warm sun
My dad smokes crack rocks

Picture this...

So the year was 1996. It was right before Christmas, Dad had been fired, and had just performed the Toboggan Boy maneuver down the front steps. There was no food in the house, and the tree had 0 gifts under it, all in all a normal Christmas season. Dad and Janet were smoking crack up in their room, Billy Bill was also there, I guess sitting on the edge of the bed watching them smoke up all his product, and Dad had just given him all of his paycheck but about 40 dollars that he planned on living off of for the next 2 weeks or until he could find another job.

We were all downstairs, trying to find a channel that worked, huddled around the fireplace since the gas was off, just 6 young souls trying to survive. We had feasted on Doritos and a hamburger-cheese mixture, Janet said that's all she ever made for her kids and they loved it, and from the tiny ass portion I had gotten I believed it. Billy Bill, sated with all of Dad's paycheck, came downstairs and went out the front door, Janet in tow for some reason. She informed her kids that it was too cold and that since my dad had no money they were going to sleep at her parents house until the gas got cut back on. Yet again, a usual day.

Dad moseys on downstairs, cracked out of his fucking mind, and I can tell by his eyes wide open vacant stare and his hair that looked like he had tried to get it to stand straight up on purpose that he is in a rare retard mode, though not mystical in nature, just as annoying. I decide to go up to my room to jerk off to Boy George posters or something, and JJ is left to the mercy of my dad's crack induced philosophical meanderings.

He sat there for a few minutes, simply staring at my little brother, a frown on his face and his eyes were red. Was it from sadness? Or had all the smoke he had generated caused a chemical reaction to his eyes? I will leave that to the philosophers.

He sat in the only armchair in the room, and called over to my brother:

"Come here, son. I need to tell you something.'- picture the family time music from Full House playing in the background, you know, the acoustic guitar wimpy ass solo that always plays -', something you might not know. Yerdaddy is a foolish, foolish man, son. I've done some things I'm not proud of, and made some bad decisions. I know it hurts you and your brother, and I know you both look up to me and love me and want to see us do better, well, I'm trying son. I may do some drugs sometimes' - at this point I would assume JJ snickered or snorted -', but I always make sure there is something to eat in the house before I do. I never smoked cigarettes, and I never will, I just know with the love and support from the family I can beat this thing and we can all live happy, with the utilities on and everyone getting together! Wouldn't that be nice? I just need you and your brother to give me a hug and tell me you love me, and how what I am doing is hurting you guys, and I will try to stop it..."

Later on that day Dad got kidnapped again, almost missing Christmas. Smeagol was still wearing his thong.

Scam time tomorrow... I finally got a picture of Bukkake Bob!

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