Thursday, July 17, 2008

Randomness Defined

swollen choad beckons
a swift kick causes alarm
don't care that he's young

First off, I was driving into work, and much like I assume everyone's thoughts go, began thinking about the Bible and the stories ensconced within.

Do you think God should have noticed that one of his angels had hooves, red skin and horns? I mean, it says the Devil was an angel at one point, but somehow deceived God. I just for the life of me cannot understand how you don't notice that the new guy has a pointed tail, red skin, horns, hooves, smells like burning feces and is molesting the livestock. Does this mean God was a manager at the firm?

I know that was a long set up for a joke but it was worth it, no?

On another note, I got some flan from the store and tried it, and that is what I would assume the consistency of my man-jisms are. That was the most disgusting texture I have ever encountered, and I instantly wanted to invade Mexico just for inventing such a crappy dish (no I did no research, if Mexico did not invent it, insert the name of the country that did)

I have not heard from Smeagol yet, so it will probably be this weekend. I just realized something that will be interesting to see:

Smeagol got a continuance at the Ferrelview Village Courthouse.
Smeagol has at least 1500 dollars in fines he owes.
Smeagol does not have a job.
Smeagol just bought a car instead of paying anyone back the money he owes them.

I am taking bets on whether or not he drives his completely illegal car to court and tries to get another continuance even though the judge last time told him it was the last time he was going to get one. The odds are roughly 1.2 : 1 that he will follow through with this plan, the .2 is because the car might break down on the road on the way there. There are also good odds that after court he will come by to borrow gas money from me, ensuring I am not home on said day or that I do not answer the door. It might be a little more awkward if I am outside shooting hoops, as it will be more obvious I am ignoring him, but fuck it.

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