Hole-EE SHeeeeit!

A gentle kiss comes
but our love, it's just so wrong?
Wii-ner Fit, indeed

Alright ya'll, there's too much for me to get all this in one post so I will have to split this all up. I took my mom to the Rennaissance Festival, that will be one post. Today though, I must get into more pressing issues.

Another thing, Smeagol called tonight. It is enough for a whole new post, but you will have to wait.

Tylester got back today, and apparently his handshake unprotected with Smeagol finally took it's toll on his frail body like a marauding rebel force. You all remember The Tylester touched Smeagol's claw, which had previously probably been ensconced in his thong or a random resident's anus. You will also note The TYlester was out sick all week last week. Apparently he went to the doctor, who proclaimed his liver was suffering. This should come as no shock, especially when they drew blood and it was 140 proof and the nurse was sued by Pabst Blue Ribbon for copyright infringement for not turning said blood over to them, as it is actually used to hold the recipe for their, actually not so bad beer.

Anyway, the doctor says something is wrong with Tylester's liver, and orders some tests to be done, among them hepatitis, all of which he.....failed. The doctor now has no idea what is wrong with the Tylester's liver, but you, my intrepid readers, do. ANd so we must all work together, to come up with a cure for Raptoroptomy, as it is infectious. Trust me, I know. Simply walking by him can cause credit card failure, low gas mileage, and a failure to produce sperm. Help me.

On another front, do you all remember the Lillian Ray stories? No? Fuck you then punk! I worked hard on those scams. Anyway, I get an email out of the blue from some guy in SLovakia, named Salsito. Apparently Lillian Ray was sending him emails and one of the return emails in her little email list was mine. He asked what I knew about her, and friends, I think I have a new partner in my scambaiting operation. I will post some of this gentleman's excellent work in the coming days, please give him the same love you give me: that is, completely platonic, with the occasional awkward copped feel.

Thank you